First Annual River Toobing July 24-25


Reporter: Ed Herndon

Our Leaders
George Collett and Josh Wallach
Our Leaders

Marion, Ron and Jay getting Ready
====>>   
Getting Ready

The day was mercifully cloudy and the water was refreshing... Not Cold.

We came bearing Snacks, Coolers full of Adult and Regular Beverages. Almost everyone rented toobs with plastic bottoms, Highly recommended!  (NOTE Toob is a hill country misspelling of Tube)

Most were armed with water guns or water cannon for there would be many battles to be waged going down the river.

Group afloat
TMCA is Ready to Shove Off

Collage
Hank ,              Gary                                        Claire  and                  JJ
The trip down the river was sometimes exciting as we ran over rapids, much of the time it was peaceful drifting.

Occasionally someone would get bored and shoot someone else. Often the shot would miss and hit an unintended victim. Then there would be a general melee involving not just the TMCA crowd but also Innocent College Age boys and girls in bikini bathing suits. The river population was estimated at 50 TMCA,  3000 College age kids,  2000 Hill country natives, and 1000 foreigners including Yankees.
We were clearly outnumbered but not outclassed.

There are several spots where the river moves very rapidly and many toobers capsize and loose their beer and their gear. If you are very quick you can often catch an unopened cold beer floating past.

Swept Under the Bridge

Toward the end of the trip Marion and I were drifting along with Tom Curran.  The rest of the TMCA crowd was behind, and there was no one to greet us as we approached the bridge.

Tom said, "I'm heading ashore here." He was in the lead on the right bank. Marion was drifting along the left bank and I was mid river behind both.  The river picks up speed just before the bridge.

"Marion," I called out, "move to the right side." I did not see any signs saying Exit Here, but the place looked familiar from a trip 13 years ago.

In a twinkling Marion was swept against the central bridge support, and I followed close behind and was pinned to the next support 12 feet to the right. Marion's ankle somehow got wrapped up in the six foot string we had used to tether our beer cooler to her tube. The beer cooler was acting like a sea anchor and pulled her slowly but inexorably into the stream beneath the bridge. The last I heard was, "Ed, I can't hold on any longer." Then she was gone.

"Tom," I shouted, "I'm going after Marion."  I never heard his reply. I pushed off and sped through the opening.  After clearing the bridge I finally saw her on the left bank about fifty yards down stream. She was resting in a calmer area by some trees. All was well but she was very unhappy about the tether/anchor.

We rested a while then proceeded down river looking for TMCA FARTers. I noticed mostly Rockin R toobs going past. Only once in a while would a Jerry's toob go by. This was a sign that we should have gotten out back at the bridge. There were some very exciting rapids and some very long quiet spells in between.

"Is there a place for Jerry's Rentals to exit down stream?" I called to one of the River Police who were providing safety patrol a one of the rapids.

"It will be down on the right a mile or so." he replied as we went blasting down the chute he was monitoring.

Marion Meets TARZAN and LONE RANGER

This lower section of the river has some pretty exciting passages so we were pretty well entertained on our extra two hours. There are several places where Life Guards are stationed and volunteers help direct traffic to the safer passageways.

We Traveled for a long time near a party of five guys and a girl. They had a Raft tethered to three toobs, one with a Cooler full of Tecate. They got hung up on a rock and the cooler spilled the Tecate into the river. Our last beer had been consumed just after the bridge. The cans float just about 2 inches below the surface and we were able to enjoy one without the lime.

About an Hour down we came to a place where two Islands separate the river into Three rapids. Marion was in the lead and got swept into the central chute. I was lucky and got the left chute. I did see her get hung on a tree at the island briefly before I shot on down river.

After about 100 yards or so I was able to rest quietly along the bank and wait for Marion to come down. After five or ten minutes I knew something was wrong. Could she have somehow have passed me? Was she down river waiting for me? Or did she drown? Or was she somehow stranded? It was time to go looking.

After 15 minutes of struggling up stream on the left bank I could see Marion standing on the second Island across the rapids. She was safe but had upended because of snagging the tree. She had smashed her face against the tree badly bruising her lip. She had lost everything but her bathing suit (toob, hat, sunglasses, and sunscreen.) The section where this happened is a favorite for divers who go in to retrieve money clips, Jewelry. Ziplock bags stuffed with personal Items. Tarzan was there fishing out valuables, and was quick to rescue Marion and get her safely ashore.

Marion could now see me across the two sets of rapids. The noise of the rapids kept us from communicating. In sign language I motioned for her to get in the river and float down where I could meet her. She nixed that idea and I will not describe the gesture she used.

Next I signaled for her to stay there, and I would come to her. OK came back. I got into the river holding onto my toob, crossed the tails of the rapids to the second island and in about five minutes was near her side.

Meanwhile Lone Ranger, who was also on the island, snagged a loose Rockin R Toob and gave it to Marion. This toob did not have a bottom.  He explained the people loose toobs all the time, and it was no problem if you showed up with a toob from a different company.

We both entered the middle stream and headed down river together. Following the next rapid Marion felt an unusual sensation... A cold can of Bud Light floated up between her legs in the bottomless toob. We shared it.

Reunion

At the Exit for all toobers we saw Sally and Tom looking for us on the shore. We shouted to them but they never saw or heard us. They left without us. We Hitched a ride with the Rockin R bus back to where we should have gotten out and then caught the bus to Jerry's.

We were warmly met by Jay and Birgit who had heard of us being swept beneath the bridge. They had   worried and even called the hospital and emergency agency searching for us.

Thanks to all who prayed and worried over us...

The Party After
After a day on the river you are ready to crash; which is exactly what we did. Our three couples went to Pappadeaux's Seafood Restaraunt after checking in to our hotel rooms.

The closest reasonably priced rooms we found were near the San Antonio Airport about 30 miles away.  Many successfully bid $58 for a three star hotel room on Priceline.com. 

Sunday we drove down town and had brunch at a riverwalk cafe. Next the ladies practiced last minute shopping, which they missed while toobing down the Guadalupe.

On the drive back to Seabrook Birgit drove the last 34 minutes home in a blinding Thunderstorm.

Lets do it again.

It was a Gute FART, and we had a great trip too!